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Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Foster Care Funnies

In honor of two of my favorite funny shows starting back up this week (The Mindy Project and Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt), I thought it only fitting that I share my list of funny things that B has said since he's been with us.  The kid is hilarious when he's not trying to be, mostly due to him either misunderstanding words or just coming up with his own witty responses.  The notes section on my phone is slowly filling with snippets of conversations that I had to hurriedly document in the midst of laughing so hard I was both snorting and crying.

Here we go:


-Why do the keep the boy cows away from the girl cows?
<<awkward silence>>
Maybe they're afraid they would get milked.


-I got this idea that comes from deep, deep, deeeeeep down in my stomach.  And it pops up into my head.


-Kids can do anything that parents can do.  Wait, no they can't.  Parents are able to not fart when they have to.


-She mentioned something in her mind, which I can read, that she wanted to take me there.


-I know what you're thinking, because I can read your mind.  You're thinking, 'How did he hear that?'  Sometimes I have ears and sometimes I don't.  I'm just natural.



-Every woman in the world thinks I'm handsome.



-We're all workin' on the money bridge!  It's a saying.



-So who was that in the picture?  (B): It was me, from the future.



-Did anyone hear that?  Good.  I think the gas tank is firing.  (He was a bit gassy haha)



-I think when I yelled I farted accidentally.  It just squeezed out like a squeaky toy.




And my all time favorite was at Taekwondo......he got to lead the beginning of class, where they recite their tenets, and one of the words he had to say was in Korean.  The word sounds like you're saying chariot, but somehow he heard "cheerios", which is what he said loudly to the whole class.

You know when you're somewhere that you are supposed to be quiet, but something funny happens, and then you absolutely cannot control yourself?  That was this moment.  I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life!

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